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Tiger the Buddhist

Posted in Irshaddering Thoughts on Feb 20, 2010

When Tiger Woods apologized for having multiple extra-marital affairs, he confessed another sin: straying from his Buddhist upbringing. Seconds later, Twitter seized up with cynicism:

* “Did I just hear him say he’s a Buddhist or a boobist?”

* “The guy calls himself a Buddhist! Try bootyist!”

* “That’s like finding God in prison. Whatever, Tiger.”

Not so fast, folks. There could be some serious spirituality behind his decision to delay professional golf and focus on restoring trust with his family. One of Buddhism’s core teachings is that the journey matters far more than the destination. You can’t control what happens, but you can control your intentions. If you attach yourself to a healthy motive and detach yourself from the desired outcome, then all will unfold as it needs to.

Translation for Tiger: Forget about hitting the links right away, dude. Concentrate on what it will take to return with a clean conscience and authentic joy. That’s a journey worth investing in.

I got this message first-hand in India last year. One afternoon, I hung out to watch Buddhist monks put the finishing touches on an elaborate sand castle at the beach. They’d spent three days working on it. My good fortune: I was passing by as they were wrapping up.

A ceremony of prayer and laughter followed the castle’s completion. Then, all of a sudden, the young men began destroying what they’d taken so much time to craft. They grabbed chunks of sand, tossed it in the ocean air and  razed the rest of the castle with arms swinging. What the saffron was going on?

I turned to the Indian-American standing beside me. He dutifully explained that in much of the West, the result is everything. We squander our lives chasing after this or that result, only to find that upon achieving it, we’re left empty. But in mystical traditions, it’s the process that counts. Our monks drew happiness  from every step of building their sand castle.

The castle itself was intentionally ephemeral, maybe even incidental. It could have been washed away by an unforeseen monsoon or tidal wave, just like an investment portfolio, the promise of a job promotion, a brand name — and fame. Had that happened to our monks, the only loss would have been something temporary anyway. For them, the permanent accomplishment was felt moment-by-moment.

As it will be for a certain golfer who’s trying to redeem his honor. Still, I have to admit a nagging suspicion: I don’t believe it was Tiger who resolved to put off pro golf. Were it entirely up to him, he’d be back in the game, testosterone raging. But precisely because he does need help, I think Tiger’s very Buddhist mother now wields the clout that his late father once did. And her guidance is spiritual, not commercial.

If I’m right, then Tiger’s one lucky son of a Buddhist. Because by learning to attach himself to a new commitment and set aside a familiar outcome, he — like our monks — could end up expanding his creative energies beyond measure.

Oh, and if Tiger needs that much more guidance, the Dalai Lama happens to be in America this week. See, you nasty Twitter negatrons? With purity of intention, there’s no such thing as a coincidence. Now go ruin your own castles.